Its hard for me to write this letter. What is a crush really? Someone you have a huge attraction to..or an infatuation with. Or someone you just want to stare at all day. Cause if that's the case...I guess Byron is my crush. Since he will prolly get another letter somewhere down the line in these letters. If I named everyone I have been infatuated with my whole life. The list would be too long and reveal how needy I was when I was younger so I'm just going to pick the longes one I had. As a very young girl I held a crush on one guy for 10 years. Yes 10 flippin years!
Dear Kasey Crosby,
I'm sorry it never worked out for us. Please pardon all my aqward moments. Even to this day I find it hard to form sentences around you. I can't say I ever loved you. I never got close enough to you even socially to figure out if that kind of love would develop. I don't know why I held out for 10 years thinking something could develop between us. I never had the courage to even go up and talk to you. Even in high school I told myself every year I would ask you to Sadi Hawkins. But I would always chicken out. Guess that says a lot for my self esteem. You were more popular and ran in a different crowd than me. Even at church you seemed unreachable to me. Though we had a lot of the same friends there. I guess its really pathetic of me. Like you were some movie star that I knew would never happen but still fawned after. When you started dating one of my very good friends, she came to me and asked me if it was ok. Like I had a say in it. But I won't lie, I was secretly jubilent when it ended between ya'll. As we got older past highschool, I saw the major differences in us come to life. We weren't compatable at all. I mean come on Your a Longhorn Fan and I' an Aggie Fan. How could that work. But even in all that I still believe that you are an amazing man that God has great plans for. You've touched many lives in the mission work you do and I believe you taught me how to give selflessly. So I guess I'm thankful we never gave it a go. God knows it prolly wouldn't have lasted long at all. Though my father told me all the time he would love you as a son. I think he considers you the son he never had. He encouraged my crush quite a bit. It seems ridiculous now how I fantasied one day you would confess your undying love for me and we would live happily ever after. Our families joined and we would be this model little christian family with our little blonde kids running around. But You are not the man God chose for me. Byron is. He knows me inside and out, like you never would be able to. Its nothing against you or wrong with you. Just and affirmation that I harbor no hard feelings or and remorse over this ridiculously long crush. I let it go a while ago. But I remain someone wo cares for you as a person and wishes the best for you. Because I know the great man you have become and how happy you will make your future wife.
Alexsey
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